“But you look so healthy!”

I saw a top ten list on Facebook of things not to say to someone who has Fibromyalgia.  One of them included the title for this blog.  It’s true: I can’t tell you how many people have told me I look healthy, I don’t look sick, etc.  I’d like to take it as a compliment.  Yes, thank you!  I struggle everyday but at least I LOOK good!  But it’s not a compliment; it’s insulting.  You don’t have to have festering sores popping puss all over the place or be using a cane or wheelchair to get around to be someone who suffers from a disease.  That’s why I don’t give anyone shit for parking in the handicapped spot when they look perfectly capable of parking 30 feet back.

My dad raised us with the typical North Dakota work ethic.  Laziness is abhorred.  I used to hear these wonderful urban legends about people who left ND for big cities and were hired on the spot by companies when it was learned they were from ND.  “Those North Dakotans have a high work ethic!  You’re hired!”  Sitting on your ass while the house needs cleaning or not working hard at your job were not options.  Hell my mom sacrificed time with her family to get her nursing degree at night.  She worked all day and went to night school, with four kids and a husband at home.  My brother some how works his ass off even though he has Parkinson’s.

I realize that the best case situation right now would be for me to be healthy and work 40 hours a week.  To contribute to my household financially.  I keep thinking once I find a less stressful job, or lose some weight, or get some relief from medications, I can go back to working 40 hours.  But I’m starting to wonder if that will ever happen.  Having these conditions, I realize how unpredictable they are.  You can be fine for two straight weeks and then wake up one day, unable to move.  Then you wonder, what did I do yesterday?  What did I do to trigger this?  What do I need to change so it doesn’t happen again?  And then you realize: nothing.  I didn’t do a damn thing different in the preceding days.  I took care of myself, got enough sleep, ate right, keep my stress down as much as possible, etc.  Some days, there is NOTHING you can do to prevent a flare up.  Shit just happens sometimes.

So how to maintain a full time, or even a part time, job when you can’t predict one day to the next how you will function?  I guess you push through the bad days no matter what.  Am I a whiner because some days I don’t or can’t push through?  Some days I give in.

So a question to those who actually read this and have issues of their own, how do you push through and take care of your responsibilities when you feel like crap?  I really think the best thing for me is to find a low-stress position and work part or 3/4 time.  I really hope there is something out there for me to do that.

Right now KC has the most tree pollen it  has had in a long time.  Wundebar!  The extreme allergic reaction I’m having has triggered the fibromyalgia.  Oh well, I guess I’ll just take it one day at a time.

Sometime when I have some energy, I’ll blog about all the quacks lurking on Facebook.  “DRINK THIS SHAKE AND YOUR CONDITIONS ARE CURED!”  The latest is Reliv.  I am sure it’s like Advocare and Herbalife.  It might be convincing if it wasn’t a pyramid sales company.

And one final vent:  what the hell happened to the spelling and grammar in this country????  I know the internet and chat boards are contributing to this.  But in high school, I had to take a basic typing class.  Mavis Beacon, remember that????

I see so many people with really positive intentions but they can’t persuade me with their arguments.  Here are basic tools of communication lost on the internet age:

* Paragraphs.  Starting a new paragraph for each different thought or idea visually breaks up text.  Not to mention it helps the reader follow your argument.

* Spelling.  Just learn to spell.  Use the spell check and familiarize yourself with commonly misspelled words such as “they’re” and “their.”  Cripes.

* Grammar.  You is no fool!  I are mad at u!  Sweet Enola Gay, is it the education system or what?

* Punctuation.  Break up a sentence with a period or comma once in a while.  Try it, you might like it.

* CAPITAL LETTERS READ LIKE SHOUTING!!!

I am sorry but I can’t take people seriously in writing if they don’t at least TRY.  I know I’m not perfect.  I’m blogging and a lot of my blogs are written in a conversational style.   But at least people can get the points I’m trying to make.   If you are dyslexic or have learning disabilities, I think you are trying your hardest and I don’t want to hear from you.  You are not the ones to which I’m referring.

That is all.  *sneeze hack*  Tschus.

This entry was posted on 15. April 2010 at 16:16 and is filed under Thyroiditis, Endometriosis, Fibromyalgia, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Health. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.